idk

"I've waited a long time for this, feels right now....Allow me to introduce myself.... I want you to come a little closer.... I'd like you to get to know me a little bit better...meet the real me....

Sorry you can't define me
Sorry I break the mold
Sorry that I speak my mind
Sorry don't do what I'm told
Sorry if I don't fake it
Sorry I come to real
I will never hide what I really feel.

So here it is: no hype, no gloss, no pretense, just me...stripped"

I had to start this with Christina because I'm just dramatic & think I'm cool.


I really don't know why I started this blog besides that I feel lame for still using livejournal...but anyway...


I had the BEST dream last night. I was in Mozambique with my father. He was kind and gentle like I remembered him. His home was beautiful and my mother was there too! She and I went to see him together. It was very vivid like my dreams have been for a long time. That made it more memorable but more painful when I woke up. But the funniest part is that I somehow traveled there with my old ass childhood passport and hadn't gotten a new one so I was like "umm how am I gonna get back?" Which is just a great reminder that I need to get that taken care of.

I need to get alot of things taken care of. I have such an attitude problem. It's like surprising me lately. The older I get the more I have to be angry about. Not a good thing. But I'm about to vent neways because OH MY GAWD!

IF these LOSERS don't stop texting me. I hung out with this guy like a year ago maybe 4 times total and then hadn't talked to him in forever. Then this summer he started texting me and I had NEVER responded. well actually I did respond once to tell him he had the wrong number. Then I thought the problem was solved. But someone kept callin me from a private number at like 5 this morning. I figured it was him just trying to find out if I lied about that not being my number. I didn't answer but of course my voicemail says my effin' name. So then I got a text from his number asking me some dumb shit about if I want him to come snuggle with me this week. I'm like wtf. I really want to regurgitate just thinking about that but I didn't answer and he said somethin else and then I just said to stop texting my number. Then someone called me from a private number again I'm like DO U THINK I DON'T KNOW IT'S YOU? just leave me alone. Dang.

If it was someone I liked they wouldn't be texting me at all. OF COURSE.

The other two guys texting me are pissing me off to but that's kind of my own fault for entertaining their company so much when I knew I wasn't into them like that. Hence why it's what I GET that the one I really wanna hear from is MIA. But that's probably for the best. I'm kinda nuts lol.

I really wonder what guys see in me sometimes. I mean I'm demanding & crazy. I mean I love myself but I wouldn't put up with me. I crack myself up though. I guess that's good.

AHH I'm 22 years old and I am so lost. This cute old lady in Starbucks today asked me if I was a VCU student and when I said yes she said that I looked so young like a high school student. I was like granny I'm 22 but I sure be actin like a high school student sometimes. But whatever. I'm very mature really. I just let stupid things bother me sometimes. I'm gonna just listen to Christina cause she always knows exactly how I feel. Pink does too. I swear...

OMG....HE IS TEXTIN ME AGAIN. AHHHHHHH! it never ends...